9. Thailand – End of the Road (Jan/2024)

Finally, a border crossing that we didn’t screw up. The Cambodian town on the border, Phsar Prom, was full of casinos, which are banned in Thailand and accordingly, the town was full of Thais. We were in no rush to get to the actual border, as we spent our final riel, changed dollars for baht then finally rolled down the hill to customs. To our dismay, the place was now packed with young Lao and Cambodians. Our ‘farange’ (foreigner) status didn’t count for anything so we dutifully lined up, finally got our exit stamp then proceeded to an even longer lineup on the Thai side. From what we could make out, all these young people were either looking for or were heading to factory jobs in Thailand. We stood out like sore thumbs but far behind us in line was a tall, bald, young foreigner who was even more conspicuous. Claire and I have only so much to talk about 😉 so I went to have a chat with him. He was a bit bizarre, one would think somewhere on the spectrum, wouldn’t look me in the eye but he finally warmed up (sort of) and I found out the following. The conspiracy theory type, he was fed up with the ‘system’ in the UK and had been looking, unsuccessfully, for a job in Thailand for the past three months. He was thinking of working at a call center because, apparently, teaching English didn’t pay. He then told me he’d heard that we have a real dick of a PM, who was limiting our freedoms and treating the truckers so poorly, a refrain I’d heard from other overseas Brits. The irony of being granted, in Canada, the freedom to protest one’s ‘lack of freedom’, to a level that few other countries in the world would have abided, seems to have been lost on both the protesters and their sympathizers.

Thirty day visa granted, we pulled out of the border, turned the first corner and, bloody hell, there’s a car coming right at me! Ooops, we were on the wrong side of the road. In Thailand they drive on the left. Yep, a different country in so many ways. Wide, clean shoulders for one, and drivers that, more or less, follow the rules. Mind you, as the cars fly by, they stay in their lanes giving little room to those on the shoulder. Motorbikes share the shoulder with us and swoosh past with even less space. We feel no safer in Thailand than riding in the ‘no rules’ scenario of Cambodia, Laos or Vietnam. Surprisingly, English speaking Thais are a rarity, even in the touristy areas. Of course, we knew beforehand that Thailand is a much more developed country than the others we’ve visited but what has taken us most by surprise, is the level of obesity in this country. Southeast Asians are, in general, small framed and the vast majority of Khmer, Lao and Vietnamese carry no extra weight. This only served to accentuate our observation of overweight Thais.

It was a two day ride from the border to the pleasant provincial capital of Chanthaburi. We were to arrive reasonably early on Christmas Day so Claire upped the ante, and had booked a better hotel, including the suite with ‘mountain view’.

Later that day, we rode up and over that hill and yes, the grade was fierce, both up and down the other side, but no question, it was ‘rideable’. We found a small, plastic-littered, but deserted beach adjacent to a resort. Went for a swim (our first ocean dip) then pedalled around the scruffy, adjacent town which served the local population and resort workers. A steady stream of tourists on scooters through town was an indication of what the tourist areas would be like. Something we would prefer to avoid. We decided to pedal out the non-touristy side of the island in the morning, find ourselves accommodation that fits our budget and stay a couple of nights and explore that side by bike. We ended up finding a lovely, stand-alone, cabin, at a great price, in a once high-end resort complex, that hadn’t seen any maintenance in years. The tourism industry throughout Southeast Asia suffered terribly during the pandemic. I think our hotel was one of its casualties.

A benefit of our early morning departures can be beautiful sunrises. In this case, a last minute tire pumping had us miss a much nicer shot, with the sun slightly lower, there was a lovely silhouette of palm trees. Fifteen seconds can make all the difference.

The temples in Thailand are even more lavishly embellished than Laos, which were already over the top. The temple, or probably better described as an altar, on the right above, was Chinese in origin. Its decorative flourishes would have made Antoni Gaudi blush! Below left is the Wat Yansangwararam temple, known for the Hindu influenced architecture and, at center, the 109 m high Khao Chee Chan Buddha, a gold image laser carved into a cliff face. Bottom right was one of the loveliest temples (the photo did not work). We came upon it in the early morning and it was wrapped in a mist that gave it an ethereal quality, heightened by its monochromatic exterior finish.

Of particular note, consistent with all the Thai frequented beaches, was that only foreigners walked the beaches (the classic, beach thing to do, in my estimation) and, most bizarrely, Thais swim with their clothes on. Maybe ‘wade’ would be more accurate. I think few are strong swimmers. Mind you, the small, powerful motorboats pulling clients on bouncing, inflatables, back and forth, just off shore, didn’t exactly encourage swimming! The seeming prudishness of the locals stands in stark contrast to Thailand’s reputation for sex tourism.

The final two days of riding into Bangkok were a bit grim. The first day was 98 km, in the heat and coastal humidity, most of which was on Sukhumvit Road, one of the main arteries into the city (pop. > 11 million). The road was six, sometimes eight lanes wide and with a good shoulder, at least most of the time, but the noise, fumes and constant edginess of the riding, left us drained. At the end of the first day, we searched high and low in a rather dismal town, split by the divided, multi-lane highway, for a place to stay. Luckily, we ended up finding a quiet, little oasis, a few blocks off the highway and staffed solely by Burmese. The following day was into the city proper. We mapped out a potential route in advance (there were many options) which worked surprisingly well. We are both getting more comfortable in traffic, and despite her earlier trepidation, Claire took it all in her stride.

Our time in Bangkok has been spent sightseeing, finding bike boxes, exploring various markets, some shopping and much of it done by bicycle. Riding in the city is complicated due to the confusion of one way streets (largely ignored by motorbikes & bicycles) and trying to follow a gps track in bright sunlight, as my phone quickly overheats. The roads are pleasantly quiet in the morning but by noon the traffic is jammed, so we just weave around and through the slow moving vehicle traffic, following the kamikaze delivery guys on their scooters. It’s fun, almost like mountain biking! Claire booked us in for a 90 minute Thai massage (has a long standing tradition) at a reputable establishment. Claire really enjoyed her massage whereas I felt beat up. My masseuse was strong and she didn’t let up. There was no communication (no opportunity to describe problem areas, sore points, previous injuries, etc.) and since I assumed she knew what she was doing, I just suffered in silence. After the opening tea service, hot face towels, then a soothing foot wash, lovely ambiance, low lighting, and so on, I thought I was in for 90 minutes of bliss. Was I wrong. Maybe she had it in for foreign men!

Home in a few days and looking forward to cooking our own meals and sleeping in our own bed !